How I Really Feel

I met a camgirl
We talked about anime
I ran out of coins
But she talked to me anyway
I know its not like that
But I checked my messages every day
When she finally sent one
it said "Let's have some fun today"

I'm just an idiot

I feel so out of place

How did I get here?

How do I escape

That's how I really feel 

I went out for a drive
It felt nice to be away
I spend my life in a screen
I spend my years in a day
With all of these almost friends
Who pretend that they see me
Or do I keep them at arm's length
So they don't see me bleeding?

I am so stupid

I know what not to think

But my brain goes on any way

All the way to the brink

That's how I really feel